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Writer's pictureGary Jive

Twinkle All The Way (2019) - Day 165, June 8th



Back in more familiar festive territory, our next movie is 2019’s Twinkle All the Way, a sweet but forgettable movie from the Lifetime network that was significant for being their very first to feature a same-sex kiss. About time, guys! This one could definitely be read as Lifetime’s reaction to the Zola scandal, perhaps the network sticking a sly two fingers up to their rivals over at Hallmark who had dropped the ball massively earlier that year after removing the same-sex brides from the Zola ads. To be honest, this isn’t exactly groundbreaking stuff, with gay characters still kept mostly on the sidelines but still - well done to the traditionally mega-conservative network for finally taking a big step forward into the twenty-first century, acknowledging that gay people exist and are, y’know, alright.

 This one follows the reliable Christmas romance TV movie formula with lonely wedding planner Cadence (Sarah Drew) joining forces with Henry (Ryan McPartlin), the co-owner of a family-run Christmas decorating and house lighting company to try and pull off a fancy festive wedding at an exclusive country lodge. Both single parents of adorable young daughters, yadda yadda yadda. We all know where this is going.

 Like I said, director Brian Herzlinger’s film isn’t going to win any awards for originality, but it does feature a little gay romance, so it’s baby steps for Lifetime with this one. It is the usual TV movie cheese we’ve encountered many times before, existing in that magical, idealistic TV movie world where everyone knows everyone’s business and all are enthusiastically involved with the town’s PTA. Naturally, Candace is a super-organised wedding planner who approaches her voluntary work decorating the elementary school nativity show with the exact same regimented discipline - she has folders and flashcards, people. Life throws her a curveball when she’s paired with dishy hunk Henry who’s impulsive and “lives in the moment” etc. Henry’s decorating business is astonishingly impressive and he runs it with his gay electrician brother Lex (Brian Sills) and adorable mother Twinkle (Lesley Ann Warren). Yes, this film features a character called ‘Twinkle’ and everyone says her name with a straight face.

 Candace bites off more than she can chew when a (frankly completely unreasonable) old pal decides to move her wedding to Christmas Eve in a secluded venue where snow is very likely and there’s only one bridge in or out. Will things go awry? Will holiday magic and a little get up and go save the day? Who can say?



 Everyone’s acting is fine, with our two leads sharing enough chemistry to make the story work, while the kids steal the show with their nigh-unbearable cuteness. There are also numerous references throughout to “ Christmas bumps”, which I assume are very particular goosebumps exclusive to festive season-related excitement. The “Christmas  bumps” chat may make you feel nauseous or all warm and fuzzy inside, depending on your tolerance for all things schmaltzy. I’m on the fence.

 The one also features an elaborate four-tier wedding cake made on the hoof out of ice cream sandwiches that everyone celebrates as looking awesome but, to my eyes, looks completely rubbish. In a film like this, the unintentional comedy is what makes it worth watching.

 Is it a ‘gay Christmas film’? Well, it’s definitely a very Christmassy Christmas film with a little sprinkle of gayness chucked into the densely saccharine mixture. Lex’s husband Danny (Max Ghanime) barely gets any lines or anything to do but does get to steal the show in the film’s final moments with that big kiss. The camera seems to linger on them for far longer than you might expect, before cutting to good ol’ Twinkle, smiling maniacally. It’s like the film is shouting out “You see that?!?! Take that, Hallmark! This is what a real proud American mother looks like. Suck it!!!” 

 Apart from that one beautifully absurd moment, it’s all perfectly adequate, pedestrian stuff that focuses on the heartwarming festive loveliness of the season without making too big a deal out of things, which is fine, I guess.Hopefully it’s onwards and upwards for these networks who, for too long, have buried their heads in the sand and caved in to the demands of the backwards thinking troglodytes of this world.



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