I get up ridiculously early next morning to watch 2004’s Christmas Child on my mobile phone in the dark on an airbed on the floor of an island lodge while everyone else sleeps. That’s dedication for you, folks. I struggle to stay awake but this one is maybe just interesting enough to help me keep my eyes open. This is based on a true story, allegedly, and is a Christian film with a heavy-handed message about forgiveness and family and such. Problem is, it’s mostly really boring and grim with features characters who don’t act remotely like human beings.
William R. Moses is overly serious as Jack Davenport, a grumpy journalist who’s struggling to reconnect with his wife and decides to take a job in the small town of Clearwater, Texas at Christmastime. Jack’s actually using this opportunity as cover to investigate his own past, as he was adopted and the fact he never knew his real parents means he feels unfulfilled and is the reason why he’s an angry douche to everyone to the point of throwing whiskey glasses about and stuff.
The Sheriff of Clearwater (Muse Watson) is a total dick, harassing Jack for reasons not immediately made clear. There’s also a mystery about the town’s hand-painted wooden nativity scene and the tragic story of its creator that ties into Jack’s own past in ways that are so glaringly obvious you start to suspect it’s all a red herring. It’s weirdly grim for a TV Christmas movie, leaving me wondering if there’s going to be some sort of tragic twist in the end. But no - it's just a boring, predictable story, competently but uninspiringly told.
The night before watching this one, my poor mother-in-law took a tumble down the stairs in the holiday lodge. It was all rather terrifying and seemed a bit touch and go for a bit. There was a lot of “stay away from the light” dramatic stuff going on but, luckily, my brother-in-law’s wife is a nurse and stepped in to save the day.
Thing is, worryingly, while all this was going on, I kept thinking “if she dies, I won’t be able to watch a Christmas film tomorrow – what will I do?!?!?” It’s a sure sign that this has become a truly insane obsession. I’m actively fretting about when and how I’m going to squeeze these films in. What’s worse is I’m actually glad that I don’t have any further trips planned for this year so I can stick to my normal routine.
I honestly can’t wait for this to be over, as it’s taking over to the point where it’s all I can think about. I keep getting emails and messages from Youtube, Amazon, Netflix and more suggesting Christmas films for me to watch or buy and it feels like it’s coming at me from all angles.
Mentally, I feel good that I’m accomplishing something unique but also worried about how much it’s taking over and tiring me out. This has definitely been like a marathon, taking its toll. I’m already fantasising about Boxing Day when I’m one hundred percent certain I will be watching something non-Christmassy…
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